Temporary Update

On the weekend of Sept. 15-17, Anna will only be able to receive calls from 4:30-8. Because calls are short on Saturday, she'll be able to make an extra call on Sunday the 17th.

The weekend of the 25th, she will not be able to receive any calls on Saturday. She will not be making any outgoing on Sunday, but she can receive them on Sunday. This is adjusted because they are staying in Springfield, MO for the weekend.

Too Blessed to be stressed

Well, it's the day after Labor Day. I have been back from my pass for two days now. I got to talk to pretty much everyone I wanted to. I had like 4 I didn't get to. :(

I just want to say THANK YOU to everyone who has been praying, calling, writing, donating, while I"m here. It has meant so much to me. It really keeps me going on my bad days. I have all my letters hanging by my bed. They make me smile. THe conversations I had this weekend really encouraged me.  It was really nice to know I haven't been forgotten about. I miss everyone a lot. It's been seven weeks since I got here! Can you believe it?!

Not much is going on right now, I"m in the middle of the renewal of the  mind sections. We take lies we believe about ourselves:
i.e. my feelings don't count
and find the truth in the Bible:
i.e. with God's help, I can own my feelings and learn to express them appropriately. I am valuable and important.

We then, put them on index cards and read them repeatedly throughout each day out loud to ourselves. ANyone can do this! I really encourage you to try if you struggle with "self" issues.

I also found out today we have to train for the M---- 5 K that is on Oct. 1st. I am not happy. I am not a fan of working out. I love to swim laps but I hate running. Pray for my patience. I'll need it.

I'm still doing okay relationally with teh girls. I still keep to myself a lot though. In this house it's so hard to do that. I'm sure you can imagine living with 30 girls.

Prayer Requests:
-my healing
-my friend at the Nashville house
-my patience

Also, I need to buy a medication next month. It's $80.00. If anyone can donate please send any amount to the address listed at the top of the blog. Put a note that it's for it. Make the check out to me though. Any amount is helpful. Spread the word please!

I miss everyone!

Anna

Revealed Wisdom

It's starting to get harder. I'm starting to remember a lot of scary memories. I'm terrified to walk in the dark. I had a panic attack today. IT was my first one in a few months. The great thing about this place is I can go find a staff member to pray with me. I'm really starting to see the power in prayer. The staff I prayed with said something that really spoke to me: "God will never bring up anything to haunt you."


That gave me a lot of comfort. It helps me not only be more aware of the presence of Satan, but know I will gain peace from all these memories. He has seriously become my strength and encouragement.

This week I have been working on a CD assignment on pride. I have learned so much! Pride is something I really struggle with.

Tonight we get to go see Lisa Conez speak at one of our churches. THere is a dessert bar too! Don't know if we get to have any though.

Also, found out that anyone coming up to Joyce Meyer weekend will not be able to see me. We probably will be asked to stand up so will see my face.

Anyways, miss you guys.

Anna

Prayer Requests:
1.For me to remain strong while remembering all these memories
2. For encouragement.

Miss you all!

I'm on pass this weekend with Joann Goans sister and husband! I miss you guys so much! FIVE MORE MONTHS! YAY :D

love love love,
anna

Hands to Heaven

Hey guys!
I miss you guys so so so so much! I'm still doing good with the home sickness but I struggled last night. I know I'm not here to make friends but I have yet to meet someone I click with. It's probably for the best since God has been trying again...and again..and again...to get me to focus solely on him and not anything else. I"m also having trouble with my race issues again. Many of you know I have a very hard time getting close to white people recently because I've started dealing with incidents where white people have caused me pain. If you are my friend and you are white, you are very special. lol. There aren't many. At this house there is only one resident who is a woman of color. I'm excited though because it's the opportunity for me to grow, forgive and transform into what God wants me to be.

There is so much I wish I had time to tell you everything I've learned. Here are some of my greatest lessons thus far:
-I'm ok with not clicking as fast as I want with the girls as quick as other new girls are because they will love me for my heart and not my personality. I always feel people love me for my personality or looks and not my heart so this will be a good experience.
-I have an addiction to worry, reasoning, ministry...yes, ministry.

You may be wondering how someone has become addiction to ministry. I found ever since I got to M----, I'm constantly thinking how I can use this material for future talks or my ministry in trafficking prevention. God is not going to work through me until he works ON me. Also, my time spent working on ministries, church stuff, has replaced my time with God. This hole using all this M---- stuff for myself, I'm constantly having to change my way of thinking. Which is exactly what they want you to do here.

I know I've only been here a week (yay!), but it feels like an eternity. But now that I have something of substance (i.e. one week) it will go by faster.

We are still reading the same book, Safe People by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend. It's so good!

On saturday we went to the projects and helped at a carnival there a church had put together. There the kids received dental screenings, shoes, rode rides, free food and snowcones, and played games. They also had a few music artists perform. Y'all know I love that type of stuff! There were about 10,000 people there.

We are doing a video series called The Bait of Satan . ***I think AJ, Kenny, Chico, Dominique, and Javonte should watch it. You'll see why.

We got to go to a placed called the muny. It's an outdoor ampitheater in St. Louis. We got to see a msucial called "Seven Brides for Seven Brothers." It was fun. Next Monday we go see "Bye, Bye, Birdie". Evidently we go study stuff from Financial Peace University. I"m so excited!

Big news: I found out we get to meet Joyce Meyer in September!!!! We are VIP at her conference. The founder of M---, N.A. will be speaking.  Also, I only get to make two phone calls on Sunday. If you are waiting on me to call you it may not happen for a few months since I can only call Two people a week. THe number you can call me at is listed at the top of the blog.

If you need the physical address to send packages, call the number and ask for it. I can't list it on here. They don't like packages mailed to the P.O. box.

If you're wanting to send gifts, do not me send me books! Lol. Everyone keeps getting me those. I don't have the room. Gift cards to walmart or target or visa gift cards are perfect. We shope there on Fridays. Forever Stamps are good too!

Also if anyone has a digital camera I can borrow while I'm here, let Kristin Barnes know. (kristinelizabethbarnes@gmail.com)

If you send a media card with it, it must be blank.


Prayer Requests: For me to stay focused, encouragement, my pride to lower and my trust to increase.

Love you and miss you!
Anna

7/27/11

Hi friends,
I miss you all very much! It's only been two days. The reality of this program didn't hit me until I got to the building. My home sickenss for you guys has been next to unbearable. I'm crying constantly missing you all.

This place is extremely structured. I had my first group and individual counseling today. In group we are reading/watching videos about the book Safe People by Henry Cloud and John Townsend. It is not at all what I expected. I really encourage the gso saints to check it out It's perfect for the type of relationship stuff you are trying to work on.

The facility is nice...really nice. It looks like a hotel inside! My roommate is cool She has a child like corny personality like me so it works out well. The girls are nice. There is not really a way for drama to happen because they designate everything. No borrowing stuff. Assigned shower times. Assigned shower stalls and bathroom stalls. Name tags on everything.

We went to the YMCA today and worked out. We go to the mall Friday and help at a community function Saturday. "Love the neighborhood." We will be handing out water bottles.


My greatest struggle is my home sickness.  I try to remember and remind myself God wants me here. I've already talked myself out of leaving a few times and it's only been 2 days. There is one girl here from NC and she can talk basketball ALMOST as god as me. We had worship this morning...SO GOOD. I have a hard time showing weakness in front of others so I am taking advantage of crying during services.

Sorry if this letter seems spastic. I've been writing in between classes and stuff. They keep us very busy. Today has been a lot  better about the homesickness. I had to make the decision to not let it effect me. I don't want to let anything distract me from this program. It was crazy how quick I got over something the second I let God have control. It feels really good.

I miss you guys,
Anna

Sweet, Sweet Love

I wanted to send a thank you to all those that came tonight to show support! I cannot believe that over 40 people came out for me!!! I'm learning to trust people day by day. It will be something else I work on at Mercy.

Something I am learning is that I can trust God to bring good people in my life. He brought me all of you into my life! Such a blessing you all are!

I will miss you guys very much!

xo
Anna

God's Confirmation

Yesterday, I received a phone call from someone who caused my family and I great pain when I was a child. I hadn't talked to him in over 15 years. He found my number through the directory at UNCG.

His reason to call was to apologize for all of the bad deeds he had done against me and my family. At first I was in rage and angry because of the wounds that resurfaced. Almost 20 years later (man, I feel so old!) and I am still wounded by pain from my past. We ended up having a great talk and some closure was had. He and I were in total agreement this phone call was perfect timing. After apologizing profusely, he offered financial help with some of the bills I had been asking God for help in.

REMEMBER: GOD ALWAYS PROVIDES AND IS ALWAYS ON TIME!

One of the issues I plan on dealing with when I'm at Mercy is my abandonment. Something I've learned recently that when you become angry, really think about why you are angry. The first step for me was lowering my pride. The second was examining was if I was angry at the person involved or was it an old wound resurfacing.

I have often gone through life blaming others for my pain. Now I have not only acknowledged my pride issues but made efforts to work through my abandonment issues.

Please pray for that while I'm at Mercy.

In Him,
Anna

Living In Abundant Grace

As I continue to prepare for my stay at Mercy my heart has become filled more with peace and less with despair. I cannot wait to get there! I could not be more excited about the transformation God is about to make in me. I'm so grateful for all of the support from all of my friends! I have never experienced this much love in my life.

Thank you all so much for your support!

xoxo,
Anna

Reaching His Destination.....

I'm leaving for Missouri in a little over a week. Several emotions are running through my heart and mind. Mostly excitement, a little despair. I'm going to miss my friends. I keep telling myself its only 6 months. I cannot tell you though how excited I am as well. At this program I will be able to put all of the pain behind me and His glory before me! I will be able to truly become a living testimony of what God wants me to be.

Now, back to packing........

xo
Anna